Post by nyislanders on Jan 18, 2021 1:58:58 GMT
After a long hiatus, the drunken GM of the New York Isles is back and ready to start a season!
"We look, feel, smell and taste great", the oddly sober GM happily announced. "It's been a long tough offseason. We Really hoped to get going sooner but the time away gave the opportunity to organize, refocus and divorce that trifling wife of mine."
For those who don't recall, NY GM's wife was having a fairly ouvert relationship with former rookie defence-man Vladimir Malakhov.
"We have cleaned up our act significantly. We switched from disposable plastic beer cups to monogrammed beer steins. We ditched the cocaine and switched solely to Adderall, really helps with the focus out there. Lastly, I have begun talks with Pepsi about a team endorsement." When asked why Pepsi and not Coke the GM replied, "Like i said no more coke, only Adderall."
The conversation shifted towards discussing the passed season and the expectations for the coming season.
Q: "What do you think about the performance of the team last season?"
A: "The boys played amazing! At the start of the season I could barely see straight, yet for all see us in the conference final. Vernon looked like Eddie Gordie with the cheat codes out there. Kaspar had an amazing playoffs leading the team in points for a couple series and Sillinger put in solid work as a rookie finishing in the top 5 in scoring out of all rookies in the league"
Q: "What are you expectations for the team this season?"
A: "I think we have a playoff caliber team, but this is hockey so anything can happen. My wish is to see the conference final again against the Penguins again and slap them back to the South Pole where they belong"
Q: "What moves have you made to bolster the team?"
A: "None... Look at the results this team has put up. Now think about that team but stronger, destined for greatness."
Q: "What if a trade presents itself?"
A: "We will take a good, hard look at it and decide but this team isn't rebuilding anytime soon"
Q: "Which player, if any, do you think will have a break out year?"
A: "Look out for Sillinger, he is looking like a goal scoring machine. Kasparaitis is in anger management where he eats glass with just a touch of hot sauce, so he will be stronger but smarter out there. Lastly, look of for Tom Fitzgerald, something tells me he is gonna be a great player for his caliber."
Q: "Final question: What team are you most worried about this year?"
A: "Detroit, Osgood looks fantastic. I think a close second would be the Caps, they gave us a good run in the playoffs but we just nudged them out."
We are all excited to see this team in action and see what the competition looks like this year. Until next time GO ISLES GO!!
"We look, feel, smell and taste great", the oddly sober GM happily announced. "It's been a long tough offseason. We Really hoped to get going sooner but the time away gave the opportunity to organize, refocus and divorce that trifling wife of mine."
For those who don't recall, NY GM's wife was having a fairly ouvert relationship with former rookie defence-man Vladimir Malakhov.
"We have cleaned up our act significantly. We switched from disposable plastic beer cups to monogrammed beer steins. We ditched the cocaine and switched solely to Adderall, really helps with the focus out there. Lastly, I have begun talks with Pepsi about a team endorsement." When asked why Pepsi and not Coke the GM replied, "Like i said no more coke, only Adderall."
The conversation shifted towards discussing the passed season and the expectations for the coming season.
Q: "What do you think about the performance of the team last season?"
A: "The boys played amazing! At the start of the season I could barely see straight, yet for all see us in the conference final. Vernon looked like Eddie Gordie with the cheat codes out there. Kaspar had an amazing playoffs leading the team in points for a couple series and Sillinger put in solid work as a rookie finishing in the top 5 in scoring out of all rookies in the league"
Q: "What are you expectations for the team this season?"
A: "I think we have a playoff caliber team, but this is hockey so anything can happen. My wish is to see the conference final again against the Penguins again and slap them back to the South Pole where they belong"
Q: "What moves have you made to bolster the team?"
A: "None... Look at the results this team has put up. Now think about that team but stronger, destined for greatness."
Q: "What if a trade presents itself?"
A: "We will take a good, hard look at it and decide but this team isn't rebuilding anytime soon"
Q: "Which player, if any, do you think will have a break out year?"
A: "Look out for Sillinger, he is looking like a goal scoring machine. Kasparaitis is in anger management where he eats glass with just a touch of hot sauce, so he will be stronger but smarter out there. Lastly, look of for Tom Fitzgerald, something tells me he is gonna be a great player for his caliber."
Q: "Final question: What team are you most worried about this year?"
A: "Detroit, Osgood looks fantastic. I think a close second would be the Caps, they gave us a good run in the playoffs but we just nudged them out."
We are all excited to see this team in action and see what the competition looks like this year. Until next time GO ISLES GO!!